Friday, December 21, 2012

Five Minute Fudge

You guys. Please tell me I'm not the only one...

Please tell me that you too are still ordering last minute Christmas presents with overnight shipping. Please tell me that you still have no idea what you're making for Christmas dinner. Please tell me that you are just now scrubbing off the mosaic of fingerprints and petrified candy canes from your Michael Buble Christmas CD so that you can cram a little Christmas music in the next couple days. Please tell me you're currently swimming in scraps of paper from your brothers' Star Wars snowflakes. And please tell me that you're scrambling around your schedule so you have one free night before Tuesday to watch It's a Wonderful Life.

If you are running around like a chicken with its head chopped off, but still need to get all your Christmas baking done, I have two fabulous recipes for you. Two fabulous recipes that even a giant headless chicken like you could manage.

First of all, you must make these Five Ingredient Peanut Butter Blossoms. I cannot stress enough how dangerously easy these are. Three ingredients in a bowl. Stir. Roll. Bake. Kiss. Devour. Awesome in a pinch and chewy to boot.

Secondly, you must make Grandma's Five Minute Fudge.

I was set  upon developing the perfect fudge recipe myself this year. I was even looking up how to make homemade marshmallow creme and everything (... and realized it's basically seven minute frosting... WHAT?).

But I decided that before I made my fudge, it would be fun to spend five hours baking a million kadrillion bazillion other kinds of cookies first. So I did. But then I smashed some eggs on the floor and sent a mushroom cloud of flour into the air and broke a few glasses like usual. My feet hurt and my brain hurt and I just wanted to brush my teeth. That was when I remembered Grandma's greatest, evilest gift to the world... five minute fudge.

So I gave a her a call and she gave me the recipe.

Three ingredients. WHAT?  Microwave five minutes. WHAT WHAT? One dirty bowl. WHAT WHAT WHAT?

One note: Grandma's microwave is wonderfully gentle. My microwave could melt an iceberg in five minutes. As I learned with Grandma's microwave caramel corn, adjustments must be made for Grandma's microwave recipes to succeed. My microwave needs to be turned to about 50% power for these babies. Yours probably will too unless you've had it since microwaves were first invented.

Five Minute Fudge

3 cups chocolate chips (I used half milk and half semi-sweet feel free to use any kind you want. Peanut butter, butterscotch, white chocolate... be creative!)
1 can sweetened condensed milk (14 oz.)
1/4 cup butter
1/2 cup lightly toasted, chopped walnuts or other nuts (optional)

Line a 8x8 inch pan with parchment, leaving a bit of overhang and lightly grease. Combine ingredients (except nuts) in a microwaveable bowl. Microwave at 50% power for five minutes, stirring after every minute. It should be very hot, shiny, and smooth. Add nuts. Pour into prepared pan. You can put it in the fridge or freezer to set faster. Cut into squares once completely set.

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  1. How long does it take to set? Mine has been in the fridge 4hrs and is still the consistency of taffy

    1. Do you mean it's too hard? It's possible it was cooked too long. Did you turn your microwave power down?

  2. Not hard at all. It's soft and stretchy when I try to cut it. Power was at 50%, mixture was just as you described above. It looks really good though. Just having an issue cutting it in slices for the candy bags...

    1. Is it possible you used evaporated milk instead of sweetened condensed? I know those cans are bigger.

  3. Oh, Yammie. I discovered cheats fudge last year and decided NOT to make it this year because I didn't want to repeat the same mistake. Ie I couldn't stop eating it all by myself. Might make some tomorrow for my cousins, even then with much reluctance because these things, they sing to you.

  4. All ingredients were correct. I just tried another batch, this time using wax paper and a pie plate. An hour in the fridge and so far so good!